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Our Lady of the (deep blue) Sea (detail), mixed media ceramic, beads and wire, 28"t x 7"w, $197 by Tammy Vitale

It is time for resolution.  Not so much as in “I resolve for the new year,” but more on the lines of my last post where one moves through a cycle of getting clear, acting on that clarity, reflecting on the action(s), and integrating the results, or resolution.

In this equation, resolution is not forward, it is present.  As in:  I am.  As a result of getting clear about x, and taking actions on that clarity to try it out, and reflection on those actions so that I know what worked and what didn’t, I now am, as opposed to:  I think this is how I should be in the coming year so I want to do thus and so.  Which, research shows, goes by the wayside in about 3 weeks.

We know this.

Recently, people in my circles have switched from resolutions for the coming year to a word that is supposed to guide one for the year.

I have acted on that suggestion, and reflected on it, and it resolves for me this way:

One word is not enough because I go through more than one cycle during the year and expecting one word to last through all those cycles is silly since at the end of one cycle I am a different person than she who chose the word.  A word chosen in good faith can become restricting if I do the work of reflection.  As did my original word of 2010.  It is good to remember that the word(s) chosen include play in their connotation, not just seriousness and work.  I forgot that.  But I corrected midstream.

I have been thinking about this a lot as 2010 has been yet another year of upheaval in my own expectations and how they play out in the real world.  I have learned *much*, and I wondered how that would affect my vision for the coming overarching cycle of one calendar year.

I came to the conclusion that it is not a list of “I am going tos” or a word (or even two or five) that will guide me.  I decided that what I really need is a question.  I am not holding myself to just one question for the entire year (see above), but I needed some time to sit with what I ask both of the Universe and myself for this cycle – or at least to start it off since I already have my goals for the year in place.

Goals for the year:  I am leading at least 3 4-hour workshops of up to 8 people, building up to a full day or overnight retreat in late fall.  I am following up on a close connection to a publishing firm to see if I can wrangle a book, and in the meantime I am creating a Wylde Women’s Wisdom deck of cards with instructions for use to self-publish.  I am finishing up 365 quotes for my Wylde Women’s Wisdom with just women’s quotes and then continuing with men who express the divine feminine in their work as well as with women.  I am creating an on-line Wylde Women’s mini-workshop series of one action/reflection delivered every Sunday to subscribers.

I’m pleased that my January 16 Vision Mask workshop is now already almost full!

These goals represent things I have put off because of fear of failure.  I keep forgetting that failure  is not bad (despite what was pounded into us in our school years).  It  merely shows that we have *tried something new (taken an action), that we now need to review (reflect upon) and tweak (resolution) so that we get clear (clarity)* about what comes next (action).  (Repeat from * to *for the rest of your life). 

And here comes the Guiding Question for  2011.

Because I will be in the midst of moving out of my comfort zone onto the edge of the known and stepping out over the abyss, I need a really good touchstone, a good tool for reflection.  So this is my guiding question to start of 2011:  Is what I’m doing synchronized with who I am being?

Look at the layers (I just love layers and hopefully more will reveal themselves):  what am I doing?  Does is resonate with who I am?  Who am I?  Am I listening to my intuition and following my heart or am I listening to old tapes and “shoulds” that I have yet to let go? Am I living in integrity with my beliefs?  What are my beliefs? How does all of this manifest in the world?  What is being born?  How does that change all of this?

I was in a bit of despair at finding my question as of yesterday.  But as I was organizing a year’s worth of information that has gathered in files that make no research sense on my desktop into something I can actually use, I came across notes from an old blog about a conversation I had through One Coach several years back.  The core of the conversation was that it is not so much what you are doing as who you are being that will move you forward.  And the question I came away with (and wrote down and then forgot, until now, so I must be ready for it now) was:  Is who you are being synchronized with what you want?

I removed “want” from the equation given to me way back then.  I have come to believe it means that I now do not have whatever it is I want, which takes me out of abundance and into need.  I am she who is very careful of language these days.  Language reflects thought which reflects belief patterns.  I am she who is conscious that each choice I make creates my life, and that I already have what I want, I just have to open to it [that’s another blog].

So to all my readers:  may you know your wyldest dreams, may they manifest, may you open to that manifestation.  Thank you for accompanying me on this journey – my life would be so much smaller without all of you.  Great.Big.Hugs. to each and every one of you!

Wylde Women’s Wisdom

Living systems evolve in variety, resilience, and intelligence; they do this not by erecting walls of defense and closing off from their environment, but by opening more widely to the currents of matter-energy and information.  They integrate and differentiate through constant interaction, spinning more intricate connections and more flexible strategies.  For this they require not invulnerability, but increasing responsiveness.  Such is the direction of evolution.  Joanna Macy and Molly Young Brown

17 Comments

  • Culliver Brookman

    I’ve been ‘living in the ?’this past month. Thank you for being, seeing and doing what you are, understand and bring to the table.

  • […] that understanding came the shift of living in the question (and, wow – be careful what you claim because I have truely been living in “I don’t know!” […]

  • […] Living in my question for the year – Is who you are being in sync with who you are? – I discover that who I am being has been somewhat muted by what will they think.  I guarantee you people who know me will argue with this.  But it’s true.  […]

  • there are so many people out there who make a difference in this world – inspire, guide, teach, share their inspirations and are there for other people. All my respect – good website, nice art, good blog, useful information.

  • What a thought provoking post! Much food for thought here for the coming year. Happy New Year!

  • Beautiful woman, Happy Solstice to you and may the coming calendar year bring you answers to your question that involve prosperity, happiness, fulfillment.

    I feel blessed that I stumbled across your Wylde Woman wisdom.

  • I have goosebumps. Thanks Tammy!

  • <div class="apbct-real-user-wrapper"> <div class="apbct-real-user-author-name">Tammy Vitale</div> <div class="apbct-real-user-badge"> <img src="https://tammyvitale.com/wp-content/plugins/cleantalk-spam-protect/css/images/real_user.svg" class="apbct-real-user-popup-img" style="align-self: center;"> <div class="apbct-real-user-popup apbct-trp-popup-desktop" id="apbct_trp_comment_id_3534"> <div class="apbct-real-user-title"> <p class="apbct-real-user-popup-header">The Real Person!</p> <div class="apbct-real-user-popup-content_row"> <div> <img src="https://tammyvitale.com/wp-content/plugins/cleantalk-spam-protect/css/images/real_user.svg" class="apbct-real-user-popup-img"> </div> <div> <span class="apbct-real-user-popup-text">Author <b>Tammy Vitale</b> acts as a real person and verified as not a bot.</span> </div> </div> <div class="apbct-real-user-popup-content_row"> <div> <img src="https://tammyvitale.com/wp-content/plugins/cleantalk-spam-protect/css/images/shield.svg" class="apbct-real-user-popup-img"> </div> <div> <span class="apbct-real-user-popup-text">Passed all tests against spam bots. Anti-Spam by CleanTalk.</span> </div> </div> </div> </div> </div> <div class="apbct-real-user-popup apbct-trp-popup-mob" id="apbct_trp_comment_id_3534"> <div class="apbct-real-user-title"> <p class="apbct-real-user-popup-header">The Real Person!</p> <div class="apbct-real-user-popup-content_row"> <img src="https://tammyvitale.com/wp-content/plugins/cleantalk-spam-protect/css/images/real_user.svg" class="apbct-real-user-popup-img"> <span class="apbct-real-user-popup-text">Author <b>Tammy Vitale</b> acts as a real person and verified as not a bot.</span> </div> <div class="apbct-real-user-popup-content_row"> <img src="https://tammyvitale.com/wp-content/plugins/cleantalk-spam-protect/css/images/shield.svg" class="apbct-real-user-popup-img"> <span class="apbct-real-user-popup-text">Passed all tests against spam bots. Anti-Spam by CleanTalk.</span> </div> </div> </div> </div>

    Susan: have a vision of you faced into the wind with your arms wide open

  • Yes! The right question is everything. And language IS important. The word for a cycle is also important, as it can be an important touchstone. Mine, at this moment, is Embrace It.

  • <div class="apbct-real-user-wrapper"> <div class="apbct-real-user-author-name">Tammy Vitale</div> <div class="apbct-real-user-badge"> <img src="https://tammyvitale.com/wp-content/plugins/cleantalk-spam-protect/css/images/real_user.svg" class="apbct-real-user-popup-img" style="align-self: center;"> <div class="apbct-real-user-popup apbct-trp-popup-desktop" id="apbct_trp_comment_id_3532"> <div class="apbct-real-user-title"> <p class="apbct-real-user-popup-header">The Real Person!</p> <div class="apbct-real-user-popup-content_row"> <div> <img src="https://tammyvitale.com/wp-content/plugins/cleantalk-spam-protect/css/images/real_user.svg" class="apbct-real-user-popup-img"> </div> <div> <span class="apbct-real-user-popup-text">Author <b>Tammy Vitale</b> acts as a real person and verified as not a bot.</span> </div> </div> <div class="apbct-real-user-popup-content_row"> <div> <img src="https://tammyvitale.com/wp-content/plugins/cleantalk-spam-protect/css/images/shield.svg" class="apbct-real-user-popup-img"> </div> <div> <span class="apbct-real-user-popup-text">Passed all tests against spam bots. Anti-Spam by CleanTalk.</span> </div> </div> </div> </div> </div> <div class="apbct-real-user-popup apbct-trp-popup-mob" id="apbct_trp_comment_id_3532"> <div class="apbct-real-user-title"> <p class="apbct-real-user-popup-header">The Real Person!</p> <div class="apbct-real-user-popup-content_row"> <img src="https://tammyvitale.com/wp-content/plugins/cleantalk-spam-protect/css/images/real_user.svg" class="apbct-real-user-popup-img"> <span class="apbct-real-user-popup-text">Author <b>Tammy Vitale</b> acts as a real person and verified as not a bot.</span> </div> <div class="apbct-real-user-popup-content_row"> <img src="https://tammyvitale.com/wp-content/plugins/cleantalk-spam-protect/css/images/shield.svg" class="apbct-real-user-popup-img"> <span class="apbct-real-user-popup-text">Passed all tests against spam bots. Anti-Spam by CleanTalk.</span> </div> </div> </div> </div>

    Happy New Year, Paula! May your word be a guiding star!

  • Even if the 2009 word drove me crazy and had to change it two months into the year, the word for 2010 worked beautifully and I´m willing to give the concept another go. 🙂
    I like your cool idea of changing words for different cycles. The questions is a great guide too.
    Best wishes for you and your family for 2011. Enjoy your art!

  • <div class="apbct-real-user-wrapper"> <div class="apbct-real-user-author-name">Tammy Vitale</div> <div class="apbct-real-user-badge"> <img src="https://tammyvitale.com/wp-content/plugins/cleantalk-spam-protect/css/images/real_user.svg" class="apbct-real-user-popup-img" style="align-self: center;"> <div class="apbct-real-user-popup apbct-trp-popup-desktop" id="apbct_trp_comment_id_3529"> <div class="apbct-real-user-title"> <p class="apbct-real-user-popup-header">The Real Person!</p> <div class="apbct-real-user-popup-content_row"> <div> <img src="https://tammyvitale.com/wp-content/plugins/cleantalk-spam-protect/css/images/real_user.svg" class="apbct-real-user-popup-img"> </div> <div> <span class="apbct-real-user-popup-text">Author <b>Tammy Vitale</b> acts as a real person and verified as not a bot.</span> </div> </div> <div class="apbct-real-user-popup-content_row"> <div> <img src="https://tammyvitale.com/wp-content/plugins/cleantalk-spam-protect/css/images/shield.svg" class="apbct-real-user-popup-img"> </div> <div> <span class="apbct-real-user-popup-text">Passed all tests against spam bots. Anti-Spam by CleanTalk.</span> </div> </div> </div> </div> </div> <div class="apbct-real-user-popup apbct-trp-popup-mob" id="apbct_trp_comment_id_3529"> <div class="apbct-real-user-title"> <p class="apbct-real-user-popup-header">The Real Person!</p> <div class="apbct-real-user-popup-content_row"> <img src="https://tammyvitale.com/wp-content/plugins/cleantalk-spam-protect/css/images/real_user.svg" class="apbct-real-user-popup-img"> <span class="apbct-real-user-popup-text">Author <b>Tammy Vitale</b> acts as a real person and verified as not a bot.</span> </div> <div class="apbct-real-user-popup-content_row"> <img src="https://tammyvitale.com/wp-content/plugins/cleantalk-spam-protect/css/images/shield.svg" class="apbct-real-user-popup-img"> <span class="apbct-real-user-popup-text">Passed all tests against spam bots. Anti-Spam by CleanTalk.</span> </div> </div> </div> </div>

    Lisa – honored. Thank you!

  • I love how honest your post is, Tammy… and yes, I find it just right that we fell on the same concept of being…. I always knew you were one of my soul sisters!

  • <div class="apbct-real-user-wrapper"> <div class="apbct-real-user-author-name">Tammy Vitale</div> <div class="apbct-real-user-badge"> <img src="https://tammyvitale.com/wp-content/plugins/cleantalk-spam-protect/css/images/real_user.svg" class="apbct-real-user-popup-img" style="align-self: center;"> <div class="apbct-real-user-popup apbct-trp-popup-desktop" id="apbct_trp_comment_id_3526"> <div class="apbct-real-user-title"> <p class="apbct-real-user-popup-header">The Real Person!</p> <div class="apbct-real-user-popup-content_row"> <div> <img src="https://tammyvitale.com/wp-content/plugins/cleantalk-spam-protect/css/images/real_user.svg" class="apbct-real-user-popup-img"> </div> <div> <span class="apbct-real-user-popup-text">Author <b>Tammy Vitale</b> acts as a real person and verified as not a bot.</span> </div> </div> <div class="apbct-real-user-popup-content_row"> <div> <img src="https://tammyvitale.com/wp-content/plugins/cleantalk-spam-protect/css/images/shield.svg" class="apbct-real-user-popup-img"> </div> <div> <span class="apbct-real-user-popup-text">Passed all tests against spam bots. Anti-Spam by CleanTalk.</span> </div> </div> </div> </div> </div> <div class="apbct-real-user-popup apbct-trp-popup-mob" id="apbct_trp_comment_id_3526"> <div class="apbct-real-user-title"> <p class="apbct-real-user-popup-header">The Real Person!</p> <div class="apbct-real-user-popup-content_row"> <img src="https://tammyvitale.com/wp-content/plugins/cleantalk-spam-protect/css/images/real_user.svg" class="apbct-real-user-popup-img"> <span class="apbct-real-user-popup-text">Author <b>Tammy Vitale</b> acts as a real person and verified as not a bot.</span> </div> <div class="apbct-real-user-popup-content_row"> <img src="https://tammyvitale.com/wp-content/plugins/cleantalk-spam-protect/css/images/shield.svg" class="apbct-real-user-popup-img"> <span class="apbct-real-user-popup-text">Passed all tests against spam bots. Anti-Spam by CleanTalk.</span> </div> </div> </div> </div>

    Mlissabeth – Very cool! You’re welcome!

    Jess – so nice to know I can still “wow” you!

  • “I am she who is very careful of language these days. Language reflects thought which reflects belief patterns.” I am a speech/LANGUAGE pathologist who sometimes has a difficult time explaining to parents/teachers how language affects every part of our education. This is all I need! Thanks.

  • jessie

    Wow!

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