TAMMY VITALE

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Ww_6_yellow_live_well Wylde Woman, 9" tall, hand-made ceramic wall sculpture with beads and yarn by Tammy Vitale

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Today the plan is to spend the day with cousins I have not seen in 25 or more years.  R and his wife have a daughter born within two weeks of my Daughter.  There was another cousin who had a son in that three week period.  Our family was full of new babies that year.

R’s older sister will travel from Florida for this visit with her own daughter, now 40 years old.  Thursday we will spend the day together getting reacquainted, sharing photos (I only have a few – everything is on digital and there is no time for downloading a lot so I made 3 pages of collaged photos and that will have to do).  R and I have emailed a bit over the past two years re-introduced by yet another cousin.  There are parts of the family who don’t talk to me anymore.  I guess all families have that.  It’s a long story and I won’t go into it, but this branch was too far away to be involved in the politics of family and who is on which side that seems to be lining up and R’s sister is a player in fond memories of my young life:  I consistently see us playing under the basement steps – something with dress ups.  I remember working a puzzle at the dining room table and her telling me about her upcoming marriage and how she didn’t like to be away from her beloved.  I remember their Mom, my father’s youngest sister, and the fact that she gave me money every Christmas when we visited.  That is family and a part of my life, whether or not someone is talking to me.  Through R, I learned that another cousin has just published a book.  Her name is Angela Tehaan Leone.  I haven’t seen her since Dad’s funeral.  I have always thought of her as the beauty of the family.  Now she is published.  We have a very eclectic and wide flung family on my father’s side.

thought for the day:  On the third morning I went to every individual in the group, and on my knees I begged as loudly as my dying body would permit, "Please help me.  Please save us."  It was very difficult to speak because I had awakened with my tongue so dry it was stuck fast to the inside of my cheek.

They listened and looked at me intently but only stood there smiling.  I had the impression they were thinking, "We are hungry and thirsty too, but this is your experience, so we support you totally in what you must learn."  No one offered any help….I had traveled over ten thousand miles from my American hometown, but I had not budged one inch in my thinking….here, I was in a right-brain reality, with people who used none of my so-called important educational concepts and civilized necessities.  …They kept saying we are all One, and they live in nature as One, but until then I had been the observer.  I had been keeping myself apart….

The thought came into my mind, "Put the rock in your mouth."  I looked around.  There were no rocks…put in my mouth, wallowed it around, and miraculously, moisture began to form… The thought came to me:  "Be water.  Be water.  When you can be water, you will find water."…I was every possible image of water that came to mind…"Marlo Morgan, Mutant Message Down Under

3 Comments

  • Hoping your visit was cleansing and healing for you. I could relate to the distance of time between visits.

  • Oh – btw, I've finally responded to your "tipping" 🙂

  • Hope you're enjoying your visit. I think many families have had riffs at different times through the years. Families can be so complicated…yet those emotional ties can be so strong. My cousins were either younger or older than me by a couple of years.
    But my daughter and my niece had their kids 7 weeks apart – which was funny, because each of them, had been born 7 weeks apart as well. It was fun both times seeing little cousins growing up so close in age, and they've all maintained those close ties.

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