In his excellent book, The Power of TED (The Empowerment Dynamic), David Emerald tells the story of how one man escaped the Dreaded Drama Triangle (DDT).  The DDT is the dynamic in which Victim, Persecutor, and Rescuer keep each other locked in an unproductive, stressful, and painful relationship.

At the heart of the victim role, Emerald says, is a dream deferred, something the Victim has decided is unattainable.  When this dream is sufficiently important, victimhood can pervade the person’s life, often to the dismay of friends and family who see how much the Victim has going for him.

Emerald proposes that the way out of the victim role is to step into the role of Creator.  The Creator revives the dream.  Each choice is a step toward the dream, and whether it works or not, the resulting insights move the Creator closer to his goal…When we live as Victims, our strategy is to minimize pain and maximize our capacity to tolerate discomfort and disappointment.

There is a substantial risk in moving from Victim to Creator, and that is the risk of disappointment.  Some part of us feels that it is better to defer the dream than to go for it and fail….It’s time to step out of the drama triangle and go for what we want, whether or not we think we can have it.  Molly Gordon, The Way of the Accidental Entrepreneur:  The practical path to building a business that fits "just right"